The One-Armed Bandit

The One-Armed Bandit has a broken wrist. Or arm.

Don’t ask her why two different doctors have told her opposite things. They do agree that it’s broken despite two negative X-rays, so go figure.


The One-Armed Bandit alternates between feeling like she’s coping just fine and feeling like she is one precarious diaper change away from crazy.

She can:

  • Nurse a squirmy baby.

She can’t:

  • Nurse a squirmy baby in public with any kind of modesty or dignity. Her apologies to all the ladies in the mother’s room at church on Sunday. Then again, her valiant attempts at balancing Caitlyn on her good arm and keeping them covered with a blanket using only her teeth probably made for good comedic relief. 🙂

She can:

  • Ride out a nursing strike. Yep, Caitlyn bit her and her reaction scared Caitlyn so badly she broke down in tears at the thought of nursing again.

She can’t:

  • Cuddle or physically comfort her baby. This is a tough one. 😦

She can:

  • Make pancakes.

She can’t:

  • Use a can opener.

She can:

  • Keep the squash bugs at bay. She has a daily morning rendezvous with them and appears to be winning the war.

She can’t:

  • Put the handle up on the car seat. This was discovered after Scott left for work today.

She can:

  • Flag down a handyman working on a nearby vacant apartment to put up said handle.

She can’t:

  • Physically put a tantrum-throwing three year old into the car and buckle her into her car seat.

She can:

  • Wait until the three year old makes up her mind to obey and climbs into her seat by herself.

She’d darn well better:

  • Improve in patience and long-suffering, learn to accept help when offered, and learn to seek out help when needed.

About beanland

Scott is a family practice doctor and Anne is a full-time mother and teacher to three beautiful girls and one boy.
This entry was posted in I am a mother, Life as we know it, Tough Days. Bookmark the permalink.

One Response to The One-Armed Bandit

  1. macpeanut says:

    Oh Anne, I felt so bad for you just now reading that! I don’t know what I would do if I couldn’t use one of my hands! I dearly hope the relief society has been alerted and they are bringing you meals or something. Don’t say you don’t need the help lady!

    Good luck! I’ll be sending prayers your way that your kids will be angels and Scott will miraculously be able to have more time to help!


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